Embrace the Shift – E98 Greatest Hits

Rick Denton  0:00  
Everyone, welcome back to another Greatest Hits episode of the loud quiet. This one's about when you take your kid to school for that first time they're away, and they're going to be experiencing things, and it can be hard to see them go through difficult situations. This episode is about our daughter, Teagan, and a really challenging situation she had with her roommate and watching her handle that, and also how we learned to navigate that as parents from afar. Hope you enjoy this Greatest Hits episode of the loud quiet.

Clancy Denton  0:31  
Welcome back to the loud quiet. This is episode 10. We made it to, oh my gosh, yeah, this is number 10. So we've been at this now for 10 weeks. We're out of fingers. Yeah, it's, I don't know, I'm, I mean, I'm glad we're still doing it. I hope you guys are still enjoying listening and watching and again, we'd love to have your input on any topics, if you'd like to be a guest, we would love to you know, y'all don't want to see us all the time, so we love when we have our guests on. And I think today's topic, once we get into the actual topic, will be something that all empty nesters, no matter what age you are, can relate to, hopefully, I would imagine, and you know, are still probably even us with our age of parents, they I think everyone is going to be able to relate to what we're going to be discussing. But we first wanted to start off with, you know, we didn't get to finish our recap of Parents Weekend with Tegan. And we'll get to why when we get to our if you upcoming topic, if you

Rick Denton  1:54  
watch the end of the video, we even are saying that of, oh, so yeah, we'll, we will do a recap, or maybe we'll do an episode. We don't know we had something in mind. And yeah, the topic that we're gonna be talking about today these this wasn't planned, no, and it's something that's was on our hearts, has been on our hearts, and now is going to be a chance for us to talk through and share, and I hope that folks can. I'd love to hear their comments and how they handle it. As we said from the beginning, we're trying to learn as a part of this process. We don't have all the answers, yeah, but let's do it.

Clancy Denton  2:23  
Let's talk about so here. Yeah, you know, we had so much fun with Tegan with Parents Weekend part two. This was at the football game, and we had, we just had a great time just getting to see her. You know, I think we said, we kind of referenced how it seems like she's just so much more grown up. She was always mature, but just on a different level. And we got to take her friends out to dinner. They were all amazing, sweet, respectful, exactly the kind of kids that they think you want. All of us, yes, you want. I appreciated that your kids to have around. They've been a great support system for her, um, which will come into so many teases, I know, yeah, but um, we did. We'd had a great time. But um,

Rick Denton  3:15  
Clancy, something that I did notice, it surrounds food again, right? Not here in this picture, but taking the people out to dinner, the breakfast that we have, the lunches that we have, Parents Weekend and food seem to go hand in hand.

Clancy Denton  3:29  
Well, you're in a different place. So of course, you're, you know, so

Rick Denton  3:32  
much fun to discover these new places and and to discover them and be able to be in a situation, because one of them we found when we were there dropping her off, and to have her say, Oh, I really want to go back to that place again. Yeah, I'm sorry, this is her home. I'm

Clancy Denton  3:47  
already thinking about the and I think we were talking about the Mexican food place. I really am ready to go back. And maybe in a couple weeks, when we go back, we'll get to visit or try another one. But it was interesting, though, just being on campus and kind of what our topic today is, how do we now adult these adult children? And it was very interesting seeing dynamics of kids and their parents on campus. And again, we didn't get that with Tanner freshman year, because they didn't have parents weekend this time, we were fully submerged in the dorm on the campus, riding the train. Yeah, the sun link, there was a big fight on the Sun link between a mom and her daughter. I mean, it was the amounts of mom cheese that I heard from other, luckily, not from our child, but from another. I'm sure she was saying things when she got back to her dorm, but it was interesting seeing no, I've been on my own for six. Weeks. Don't come back in here and try to be my authority.

Rick Denton  5:04  
Don't try to be my authority. They're also, I think, an element of what we saw on the train, which was, I mean, this was F bomb riddle. This was, this was housewives esque type. You know, one of the individuals in the fight just abandoned the train, left the other individual to continue on. I think some of that, too, was, not only don't be my adult, don't be my authoritative figure. Don't act like my friends. You're still my mom. You're still my dad. Don't suddenly try to be the stupid college kid, because you're here,

Clancy Denton  5:37  
right? And, and, you know, we we had fun at Tanner's parents. We talked about the Casa. Yeah, we had fun. But, like Tegan said, Yeah, but y'all don't get dumb, and y'all can, you know, we know the line and not to cross it. And it was, it was sad. That girl was crying. Her mom was embarrassing her. I mean, it was just, you just felt so awful. And, yeah, it was just, it was really, I mean,

Rick Denton  6:10  
and that's the serious one,

Clancy Denton  6:11  
yeah, the rest were funny. Like, you know, we tried to call you. I was asleep. I mean, it was just, I could just, I wish I'd written down all of the little Do

Rick Denton  6:22  
you remember the one when we were walking and it was we were suddenly, there's a we couldn't see the girl behind us, but we heard her talking. She was on the phone, and it became clear that she was talking to her parents and about rent and a place to live in. Well, if y'all would just come out and visit, and they clearly didn't want to visit. They wanted to say no to whatever property she wanted to be in. Of course, we're hearing half the conversation. So we're making we're filling in some gaps here. And then finally, it was, well, if you just give me the money that you were gonna give to me, I'll just pick the place on my own.

Clancy Denton  6:51  
I mean, it was just, and this is really the first time that I've picked up on it, and maybe it is because I'm in that situation now where, you know both of our children were in that situation. They're adults, yeah, you know they Yes, we still are fully funding them, so we do have some control. But you know, they're making their own decisions. They're, you know, having to deal with things that mom's not sitting at home waiting for you to come home and tell us what happened. You know, so

Rick Denton  7:29  
even, like the place that Tegan is choosing, or at least if everything goes through right looking at living We were initially somewhat reluctant, like we had some very strong perspectives, that's, that's not the right word, but just had some concerns going into it, but she the adult child, showed us the not only just showed us the place, but kind of walked us through some of the concerns that we had had, and almost spoke to us kind of adult to adult, to some degree, to the point that we're like, yeah, absolutely, you were right. You were more right than we were going into that thought about where to live. And

Clancy Denton  8:02  
that is one thing you know. And I know parents, all the parents of college kids right now, especially the freshmen who are in the dorms and want to move out of the dorms. It is insane to me that these kids, they've been there for six weeks, oh yeah, and they're already having to figure out, Where am I living next year? Who am I living with, I have to go through this 52 page lease agreement with my dad so that we can, you know, man, that was dull. And, yeah, it is crazy. And I will say Tegan has, Tegan has treated it totally different than Tanner did. We were, we were the parents on the phone. I'm going to sign the lease right now. I need you to do this. Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, you know, wait,

Rick Denton  8:45  
what? You're signing a lease. Yeah. You got to do it

Unknown Speaker  8:48  
in three hours. Yeah? What? Yeah.

Rick Denton  8:50  
We're nine months ahead of deadline.

Clancy Denton  8:52  
And Tegan has thoughtfully thought out, you know, where she wants to live. You know, some of the friends already live there. So it's been vetted so but it is just so crazy to me that they're already having to figure out next year's living, when they're just getting settled in to where they're living. Now, they're barely

Rick Denton  9:13  
under Exactly. They are barely understanding just like simple things like taking the train and that sort of stuff. Tegan knew about it. She's done it, but it's not the same as a senior who has been fully, and I don't want to overstate taking the train. This isn't New York folks, one light rail line that goes from campus,

Clancy Denton  9:27  
but it is awesome. I loved it. Yeah, we used it quite a bit. Yeah,

Rick Denton  9:32  
absolutely, yeah. And so that's something that we've talked about, is even in Parents Weekend, how we've done Parents Weekend, and having them back to back, the difference between our two children was really eye opening, and even just how we did Parents Weekend found ourselves feeling differently, doing things differently that I don't know, going into it, I really thought about going into it.

Clancy Denton  9:58  
No, you could really and you. And we we know the differences between our kids, but it really when Tegan was living at home, if she was done with whatever, she just went to her room, you know, whereas on Saturday, when we had a bulk of time that we didn't have something scheduled or planned. She's not real. She's not bad, but it's not her jam to just be like, okay, yeah, let's just walk around campus and the tailgates for three hours before the game. Yeah, she, you know, shut down. And I pulled you aside, and I said, Look, she's done, yeah, she will, she will come back at the game, but she needed to just chill and have some down time so that she could get and once we got to the game, she was right back in and talking about, I mean, yeah, she was,

Rick Denton  11:03  
know, her football, which is right, you are right though about that, that it was whereas when we'd done the ASU ones, there would be maybe a, okay, we're going to do this party, and then we're going to hang out at this house and this guy. So there were some scheduled things, but some of those things involved unplanned elements inside of them, and that was okay, this one. And I think too, there's a little bit of learning that we have about the U of A Parents Weekend that we are not going to invest as much of our social energy in the tailgate that's there because it's great, it's fine, but it wasn't necessarily the right scene there for us. You're right, though, that is a difference, and we felt that, because it was probably the first time that I'd felt almost like an internal like, I don't want my child to be bored when I'm with her, right? I don't want her to be thinking, Well, God, I wish my parents weren't here, kind of thing. And I had that feeling, and it was more about what you described, rather than her parents. And yeah, once the game started different, and it was also a good game. So that sort of helped, too. She was into it. We were into it. Yes, we left before it was over, because we were all spent. It was a lot of fun. And like y'all saw in that picture, it's beautiful there. That sunset going down behind the mountains, spectacular.

Clancy Denton  12:18  
Yeah, it, and I think probably the kids, and I'm sure a lot of the parents would probably say that, you know, they probably are having a little bit of angst of, what do I do with my parents right now? Because we're just here, you know? And so unfortunately, in Tucson, there's not a ton of close hotels, like right around campus that are nice, and so we were staying pretty far out. It's not like we could just go back to our hotel and say, hey, well, we'll pick you up in a few minutes. You know, she did come with us, and that was a good time when we could get some we knocked out. Yeah, yeah. Her adult business. So, but yeah, so I'm sure she was feeling a little bit of, you know, it's not like we can just go hang out in her dorm room. There's nowhere to go in your dorm room. So, and I think that's

Rick Denton  13:10  
something we've learned, and we will take away a tip for parents going back to school. And I think we came into it naturally with Tanner. Our Saturdays with Tanner frequently were we didn't even see him until the afternoon, or even later afternoon, because he'd be doing he'd one wake up later. He would do homework. Tegan is an earlier riser, and this was our first time seeing her, so he probably tried to maximize as much time whether, I think we now know to almost replicate elements of how we did it with Tanner. Of we hang and then we leave, yeah, and then we and it's okay for you to go off and do homework, and that's all right, and we'll go do our own thing or sit by the pool. I don't care, but that separation is okay. The first one, we just felt that yeah,

Clancy Denton  13:51  
we want yeah. And I think she was, you know, excited to be with us, too, and she's already prepared us, because when we go back in a couple of weeks, she's already said, I do have something going on during and we're like, Tegan, that's fine. This is just a check in I want to see your face. Is everything good? You know? This is not a you need to cater to us the entire trip. This is a just wellness check, or whatever you want to call it, on both of them

Rick Denton  14:21  
for Thanksgiving, let's be honest, it's a wellness welfare check and it's a chance to go get because I was telling you when we walked out of church today, I love Arizona. It's funny. How many comments did we get coming out of church? Oh, bear down all that kind of stuff. I'm wearing this I love that state. I'd be there in a heartbeat, right? And so it these trips are also just a chance, like this one coming up, just to be there. Love it. Sorry, miso, he's behind the chair. Sorry, we are going to be leaving you for a bit, so he seems concerned.

Clancy Denton  14:50  
So yeah, so you know, well. So our plan on Sunday was to take her to breakfast and then we were going to. To put our phone up in the car and do our recap, airport to Phoenix to the airport. Yeah. So we pull up to the parking lot at the dorm. She gets in the car and immediately starts bawling. And I was like, Okay, no, wait. Wait, what happened? This is what happened. It's like, I can't do this

Rick Denton  15:22  
again. We left you. Everything was good.

Clancy Denton  15:24  
Cried in this parking lot too many times. So yes, so this is where we've had to maneuver that Sunday and through the beginning of this past week. Just how do you help your kids when one, you're not physically in the same state that they are, and two, you're trying to give them some leeway, but you're also trying to help them direct, you know, the stormy seas. That's, you know, you want to solve for it, yeah? You, I mean, you have to talk, yeah. I mean, we'll, we'll talk about how, yeah, we'll get into the way I wanted to. Not only are

Rick Denton  16:13  
there differences between Tanner and team and there are differences between Rick and Clancy.

Clancy Denton  16:19  
So, yeah, so, I mean, that's

Rick Denton  16:21  
not how we expected to start that day, because that break. And here it is. We were so excited to see her, and this is the last chance to say goodbye after a breakfast, or, I guess we hadn't eaten breakfast yet, but, yeah, this was, this was a real kind of almost Teagan. First time with dealing with this sort of relationship, difficult. Yes, she,

Clancy Denton  16:41  
for those of you who know Tegan, for her to get a text from someone, and this came later in the week, telling her that she was so rude and that she treated people badly. I mean, that is not Tegan. No. I mean, I know everyone thinks their child is good and could not, you know, do things like that. She does have resting bitch face, but she is not, but her inside is one she would never be intentionally mean to someone unless she was defending someone else. She

Rick Denton  17:23  
would never initiate the unkindness. And even when the unkindness is brought to her, she is frequently, well, she was always the encourager and drill team, which she's in another word, she was the piece. She is the piece, exactly.

Clancy Denton  17:36  
And so I don't think when you meet your roommates now over it's almost like a dating app for people that don't have kids that are currently in college or have not been in college for a while. It is like a dating app. So you know when things matched great the first interactions were good. There were just some boundaries that started getting crossed and

Rick Denton  18:09  
boundaries and some incompatibilities that were unexpected. Yes, yes, and I'm not even gonna say right or wrong here, just incompatibilities about even some of the innocuous like times and schedules, right? So that's why I'm using that term. Yeah, some of the boundaries, though, there is a right and wrong to some of those boundaries. Even still, it was, it's roommate conflict with depth that just

Clancy Denton  18:29  
was. And, you know, I will say it probably started the second week of school, maybe third. And, you know, Teagan had addressed it directly with her roommate.

Rick Denton  18:45  
Things initiating the conversation, let's say, Yeah, need to talk about x. And they talked about X,

Clancy Denton  18:50  
okay, and things got better for a few days, but then, you know, so Tegan took it up, you know, went and talked to her. Ra, you know, for advice, yes, for advice. She was not tattling. She was not I have a situation.

Rick Denton  19:08  
How am I supposed to handle this? Not you fix it for me. Ra, but rather, how do I handle

Clancy Denton  19:13  
this? No, I will say the one thing Tegan is mature when it comes, way more mature than some 18 year olds way more mature than some almost 50 year old

Rick Denton  19:25  
and multiple of the 50 year olds texts that we're not sharing. Yeah, her maturity is beyond what I think we expected and the way she handled and yet, when she gets in the car and she's that upset, your first reaction as a parent who eight months ago, would have been not a parent of an adult. But now you enough to math, right? But either way, now it's about how. First I even would, you know, I even asked Tegan, do you want recommendations? You know, even just asking that, are you just telling us what it is? And she didn't. A yes right at the beginning, which I found interesting. She She kind of wanted to work through and just talk through this first

Clancy Denton  20:06  
Yeah. She wanted to vent, yeah. And that's what, you know. And I think you did a good job of that, because as a male, typically, y'all want to fix, oh my gosh, and, you know, and early, even in marriage or even dating, it was, I don't want you to tell me what to do. I'm just telling you what's going on. And let me just, Oh,

Rick Denton  20:30  
that is 100% where this came from. You're right. And

Clancy Denton  20:35  
but then, you know, she did, and so we helped her, and she had already actually, really figured out? Yeah, she had already figured out what her plan was, what you know. So okay, we, you know, fly back here Sunday. We thought either silent car, very, you know, and that evening, we get a text that she said something else had happened, and now you know, she was taking it to the next level, of setting up a meeting with her RA and her roommate

Rick Denton  21:08  
as a mediated session. Right? She was looking for the RA to be she

Clancy Denton  21:12  
just wanted someone else there, not to take her side, but just to be in the room while they were they could both express their feelings. So, okay, so Monday is when we get the barrage of or No, no, it was Tuesday. Yeah. Tuesday group that evening. That's right, yeah. So Monday, everything, I guess, went fine. Maybe Monday night was when she said, anyways, I don't know the timeline, but yes, Tuesday is when we get texts that Tegan screen shotting me, texts coming back and forth. And, you know, they're just not, not. I mean, she was even like, I'm in Spanish class and I'm crying and

Rick Denton  21:57  
and so what do you want to do as a parent? Right then, what do you Clancy, want to do in this situation?

Clancy Denton  22:05  
I was about to get on a plane and go take care of things myself. And one of my friends was coming with me to

Rick Denton  22:13  
help. I was being asked for two tickets to Tucson to go break laws.

Clancy Denton  22:19  
I really was not going to do that. Now if, if someone had caused any kind of physical harm to my baby, then yeah, I would have been out there, yeah, and even her brother told me. Tanner told me the next day I was about to get in my car and drive down there. And I was like, Rick. Was like, both of you Stop, just stop.

Rick Denton  22:37  
When you get to pose, you need to not do say this, but that is the natural reaction, right? And yes, I felt the same thing. What do you want to do? You want to just go you want to tell an 18 year old you're being a twit. Yeah, right. And to be fair, we have one side of the story. I to be a little bit fair. I feel very confident that this is a case where Tegan was, you know what? I'm not even going to say that we, just as parents of our child, we sided with our child and wanted to solve for our child, and it was hard to bite tongues sometimes and not say and not do some of the things that we wanted to say and

Clancy Denton  23:18  
do. And I could have intervened, because I had a way to intervene. Did, but I I have not this entire time. I haven't.

Rick Denton  23:28  
We didn't call the Ria. Ria. We didn't call the Ri never done that, but I meant the list

Rick Denton  23:33  
of what helicopter parents, right have done. We could have contacted their parents. We could have interesting maybe we'll mention a little later, but we found out that that was the right choice on more reasons than we would have realized, because others had said it being in similar, different situation, but roommate situations where they'd contacted the parent and it completely blew up

Clancy Denton  23:55  
in their face. Yeah and yeah it it's hard. It's just hard to, you know. So she tells us, you know, her time is set up for this meeting. And of course, you know they're two hours behind us and so, or you know, so ahead of us, or whatever behind, I guess, yeah. I mean, physically, I was sick all afternoon Tuesday, all when we got to our rooted class, which is a class we take at church. We asked specifically if we could just stop and pray for Teagan and her roommate, and that, you know, it would just get resolved, and everything would be, you know, good. So, yeah, so we're sitting there the whole time and rooted like, I'm like, looking at my phone the whole time. Why isn't she texted yet? Why isn't she why is this meeting?

Rick Denton  24:47  
What's happening? Yeah, but I mean in the end, I mean and in the end, because, you know, this is more about a story about what we as parents did and need to do. You. And the reality is, we did. We coached, we advised, we offered in Well, I was gonna, yeah, absolutely. What can we do when your kid asks for advice? We provided it, but we didn't provide it unsolicited. We we were always there. Isn't here we incur this. Sounds like we're awesome, by the way, by the way, no, we were struggling with this well, but we, in the end, we let her know, we support you. We have you. We have your back and totally buy into your approach. We think you're being mature in your approach, like encouraged her and all that, but we didn't do for her, and we only offered recommendations when she asked for specific recommendations and and I want to hope that that's what we'll do going forward. I guarantee that when grandkids get into the mix and all sorts of craziness, that we're going to have those same temptations. This was our first first well with her, for sure, but certainly the most dramatic moment where we have had to check our instincts as parents, recognizing that our child is now not a child, but an adult. And I want to land with this so much prayer. And yeah, I sincerely believe in the power of prayer, and I sincerely believe in that instance it helped, because the outcome to this story is, I mean, they're not going to room together in the future, but they've come to a cordial, compromised agreement to resolve the challenges that they were facing and set the boundaries that they needed to set.

Clancy Denton  26:26  
And they're talking again, and, you know, and they did, both of them had to compromise on some things. It did it. And did fine. She said, Things are good. They, you know, are speaking again in the room. It's not just like an icy, yeah, when you enter. So, you know. And I would like, you know, I wanted to make sure that someone was with her. I said, when we were on our way to our class that night, I texted her. I said, Are you at the gym? Are you, you know, burning off the energy and and she was like, No, her friend Alex, was with her and hanging out with her until, you know, so I'm just so thankful that God has put good, supportive people already in the first she met them within the first two weeks of school. And you know, it is just they are there for each other. We've already seen it in other situations, too. And so it's just a good, supportive group, which is what she had here. And so I'm glad that she has has found it there. And so, yeah, so hopefully, you know, let's just keep things moving in the right direction. But we know now, and you know, like you always want to say and but you don't want to hear, you will learn something from this. You know, this is a conflict that she has never had to deal with, and especially as a girl, you know boys, you don't see it as much. I mean, I know there have been some nightmare roommate stories. I've seen them on the Facebook pages, but, you know, boys get over stuff quickly. It's not as usually as there's not the same hangover, yeah. And so I am just thankful that she dealt with it and she dealt with it in the right way, and that they just got things resolved because, yeah, it was just it's gouverging When your child is hurting,

Rick Denton  28:37  
hurting and hurting and so many thoughts flood into your head of, not only is she hurting, she's hurting 1600 miles away from us. Is this going to affect her grades? Is this going to affect her interest in being in college at University of Arizona? Altogether, all of that she handled maturely, and it's come to a really good conclusion. It just was angst riddled.

Clancy Denton  29:00  
Yeah, because she loves it out there and is having a great time. But if you physically live in a place where you don't feel good about being there, so yes, so I'm so glad that it so far.

Rick Denton  29:16  
And yes, yeah, not. Oh, this, yeah, Oh, that scared me. So he's behind you.

Clancy Denton  29:24  
You know that it seems to be, yeah, to be good,

Rick Denton  29:27  
exactly. We said that during it, while we're tired. I said the like things you're gonna have to do, you're gonna do, but you're gonna grow from them. And she did. She didn't want to do the things that she had to do, but she had to do the things that she did.

Clancy Denton  29:39  
And I think, you know, going back to your point of talking about, you know, when other you know, the kids, significant others, children, you know, we were blessed with parents on both sides that never, really, never tried to step in and meddle and. You know. So you know that has been good models for us, that hopefully we will, as long as Tanner's significant other doesn't take him away from us, then I'm okay.

Rick Denton  30:13  
Different issue. I know I watched, you know, my mom talked about that with Nana, that she said she had the best mother in law because of one, the relationship, the positivity, those things, but she didn't get in the way. So I think my mom and did my extension, my dad had that exposure. I'm not sure what informed your parents, but they absolutely were not meddlers. And so I hope that we can but they they were involved. They found that wonderful balance of being involved but not meddling, yeah, and that, I think, is going to be a great model for us as we continue into that phase of empty nest, which let's wait a little while for us to get to that phase.

Unknown Speaker  30:52  
And I think both kids are

Clancy Denton  30:54  
new. I mean, because one of their mutual friends just got engaged, and it's, you know, Tegan, good friend, sister, and then Tanner was the same age as her, and, you know, but she got engaged, but she's not getting married for a while. But, you know, they both looked at me because you were gone, had stepped away, and they're like, you have nothing to be wearing. I was like, yeah, no. I said, let's, let's get through all of your graduate schools and that kind of things. And then, then we can, you know, talk about that

Rick Denton  31:24  
stuff. It is fun, like, there's elements of the family that are absolutely like, those kind of things. It was great for the four of us to be together. And those kind of conversations can be had as a family,

Clancy Denton  31:35  
yeah, which is definitely leading us into our

Rick Denton  31:39  
I was doing a segue there. Yes,

Clancy Denton  31:41  
it is nice. You know, we have a full family group chat. Then we have chats with both kids, and then they have their own, you know? Now, this one was on the family

Speaker 1  31:53  
one we came to find out later there was some salt, good, yeah, there was some stuff going on. So remember,

Rick Denton  31:58  
let's set this up. Though. Remember, we're talking about kids that are two schools in Arizona that are rivals. If you don't know Arizona, state and University of Arizona feel the way about each other that Duke and Carolina do, or Texas and ou feel about each other. It is a good in state or near regional rival. Yes,

Clancy Denton  32:16  
and they and they like to dig at each other. I mean, even on, like, the academic side of things, you know? I mean innovation. Well, we've got Fulbright scholars,

Rick Denton  32:29  
but they've been fighting like this, and the fun fighting throughout their entire house, wrestling on the bridge up here, doing whatever they do.

Clancy Denton  32:37  
Yeah, no, they're Yeah. They both like to yeah, get at each other. So, so, yeah, so, well, yeah, but let's set the So, ASU was playing hockey men's hockey was playing the U of A team, which, yeah, we'll say, what? Yeah. So, so Tanner's texting Tegan during the entire game, oh, it's 400 it's 12 00. My gosh, you know. And she did not respond at all. So then he sends this text. You want to read it. I

Rick Denton  33:16  
forgot to even mention Arizona had an extra man in the ice for about a minute. Refs didn't catch it and we still scored on them.

Clancy Denton  33:24  
And her responses. Response was, sorry, I was busy doing adult things instead of spending time looking for your for scraps of what you can be good at. And we were both Rick and I'm like, Whoa, that was a good response. It's the quiet ones that come in with the good responses. So then yesterday, I'm on Facebook, and I was like, Oh, the U of the ASU men's hockey team was playing the U of A men's club hockey team. They don't have a d1 team, so take yourself. Okay. So, yeah, so the Thanksgiving game is going to be fun between them, because we're actually going to it this year. Yes, Thanksgiving, yeah. So that'll be, that will be a treat. So we'll see

Rick Denton  34:14  
if we can film on site. There. It may be from jail where they're getting bailed out from their battles, but we'll see how that goes. Yeah, so it Parents Weekend was fun. This is going to go down as what I hope, I hope, is a unique Parents Weekend that is not replicated. You've already said that this weekend, when we go out there, that we need to go to the same breakfast place so that we can actually enjoy the

Clancy Denton  34:34  
breakfast good. And I we were all in such a mood and crying.

Rick Denton  34:38  
I'm trying to, I'm over there, trying to be the Chandler of the group, trying to make jokes and make us laugh while you and Tegan are crying at the table. I'm sure the servers thought, What the heck is going on? So we will go back and have a good meal and enjoy that place, Tiny. I can't remember the name of it. Tiny place. Maybe Franks. Franks. Maybe 15 seats. Good stuff. Yeah. Well, the empty nest is quite a journey. I. Yeah, yes, it

Clancy Denton  35:01  
is so and I'm sure we're, you know, like I said, everyone has dealt with Yeah, trying to guide their children without driving the boat. I mean, it's just yeah.

Rick Denton  35:16  
That's how we figure it out, though, yeah,

Rick Denton  35:19  
and I suppose we figured it out this time around,

Clancy Denton  35:23  
maybe, yeah. I mean, we didn't have to do much, like I said, She pretty much took control. So

Rick Denton  35:30  
absolutely, that ends it. That's another episode. It was. It was a lot of fun recording this one again.

Clancy Denton  35:35  
Yeah, please don't forget to share and subscribe and like and

Rick Denton  35:39  
yeah, and there will always be some sort of poll or comments for you to place on the Spotify version of this. Would love to get your opinion about things and get your topics, as we're eager to know what you want to talk about, and actually, selfishly, we're eager to learn from all of you, so yeah, like follow and tell a friend. Yep. All right, kiddo, well, there it was. Another episode, 10, I know all to two digits of the loud, quiet living the empty nest.

Transcribed by https://otter.ai